Can U name FIVE Great
KINGS who have brought HAPPINESS into PEOPLES LIVES?? ANSWER: "drin-KING, smo-KING, lic-KING, suc-KING & ofcourse fucKING djlynn
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a kid says to teacher:techer
meri ammi ko bacha hojaye ga. teacher says: yes kid:meri anty ko bacha ho jayega. teacher yes. kid: teacher aap ko bacha ho jaye ga. teacher yes. kid: teacher is munni ko bacha ho jaye ga. teacher no beta ye abhi bohat choti hay. kid : dekha munni men ne kaha tha na kuch nahi hoga Lucky
A womman was bragging to
her neighbour about her son, a university student. "Our son is so brilliant, every time we get a letter from him we have tio go to the dictionary," said a proud mom. "You are lucky, "the neighbour said. "Every time we get a letter from ours, we have to go to the bank!"POROZA
Two ladies were working in
a furniture shop,one for ELLERINES and other one was working for WONDER furniture shop they use to take the same bus at same stop at the same time. Soother day they were waiting until late and the lady thats works for WONDER said "I WONDER WHY THIS BUS IS LATE" and the other lady didnt want to be left out she said "I ELLERINES WHATS WRONG? Nonto
One is looking very upset
by thinking that....... "HOW HIS SISTER HAS 2 BRITHERS AND HE HAS ONLY ONE"Hanish
eight man r raping a
woman ..the woman is laughing nonstop ..so after the men get bugged n ask her y she laughing ..she replies " mujhe AIDS hai "*******RocKy
Man: sir i m married,
i had 10 childs, plz tell me my favorite stone, favorite star, & favorite number, Astropamist: Oh. No. ab ap ka guzara SABAZ SITARA sey hi ho ga......
PATENT:- DOCTOR SAABH MUJHE BAHUT
PATLE DAST AA RAHE HAI DOCTOR:- KITNE PATLE PATENT:- DOCTOR SAABH BAHUT PATLE DOCTOR:- KITNE PATLE PATENT:- SAABH ITNE PATLE KI SMS PADNE VALLA KULLA KAR LE MOHIT ADLAKHA
A girl & her grandma
were sitting in the balcony. Girl shouted to her mother[who was inside]"mom, Tom cruise is coming" Mother:"you come inside" Few minutes later Girl shouted, "mom, Clinton is coming" Mother:"Ask your Grandma also to come inside" shankar
Judge-y did u attack tat
young man? Old lady- he grabbed me, took my clothes off, threw me on d bed & shouted APRIL FOOL!Dyson
Q-Why is reading a Playboy/Playgirl
magazine like reading National Geographic? A-U get 2 see many great places u dont get 2 visitDyson
in chemistry class teacher asked
a girl:what r Nitrates?Girl answered shyly:nights rates r high then day ..! cuteboy
A daughter sends a telegram
to her father on her clearing B.Ed exams,whichthe father receives as:"father, your daughter has been successful in BED."By Ikram
Best SMS of the year-
a Mother makes her son "INTELLIGENT" in 20 Years, but a girl makes him STUPID in 2 minutes.By Jeet From Mumbai
A Wife is sleeping in
the middle of the night, she suddenly shouts: "Get up quickly my hasband is here!!!" the man gets up from the bed, jumps out the window, hurts himslef and then realizes "Damn, I am the hasband!!!" Who's guilty in the situation?????????????By Forever
Laloo Prasad Yadav was hosting
a Japanese Delegation for Business Development to Bihar. The Japanese Emissary was quite impressed with Bihar and he stated, "Bihar is an excellent state. Give us three years and we willturn it into an economic superpower like Japan." Laloo was very surprised."You Japanese are very inefficient" he stated. "Give me three days and Iwill turn Japan into the next Bihar!" By kunjava
After having resigned as the
CM of Bihar, Laloo decides to go modeling. Once he enters the herd of buffaloes and resting his elbows on the back of the cattle he poses for the photo. Next day the photo appears front page of a newspaper. GUESS THE CAPTION !! "Laloo, third from left!"By kunjava
At a bar in New
York, the man to Laloo's left tells the bartender ,"JOHNNIE WALKER, SINGLE." And the man's companion says, "JACK DANIELS,SINGLE." The bartender approaches Laloo and asks, "AND YOU, SIR?" Lalooreplies: "LALOO YADAV, MARRIEDBy kunjava
Once Laloo wanted to know
the time difference between Bihar and Las Vegas.So he called up the Tourist department and asked them "Ji..could you tell methe time difference between Patna and Las Begas...". . The man at the other end replies "One second sir..." and Laloo immediately replies "thank you"and puts the phone downBy kunjava
Once Laloo was coming out
of Airport. As there was a huge rush, the security guard told Laloo "WAIT PLEASE" for which Laloo replied "65Kgs" and moved By kunjava
chota sardar:mummy kal raat ko,phir
maine bathroom ka darvaja khola toh light apne aap jal gaye.mummy:kaminey phir tune fridge main susu ki! By baasha
Girls Hostel ki light chali
gayi. Ek ladki ne electric office me phone karke kaha: Light chali gayi hai, aadmi bhejo. Replied "Aadmi nahi hai, mombatti se kaam chala lo."By chumma khan
Ques : Why do Couples
hold hands on Wedding Day? Ans : Just for Formality, like 2 Boxers shaking hands before Fight!!By Uzzal
Question? who is stronger man or
Question? who is stronger man or woman? Anser? A woman coz she lifts two mountain on her chest while man lifts his crane with the help of 2 stones. By marwat
Maid cleaning bedroom found a
used condom and kept looking at it. Madam asked dont you have sex in the village, Maid "Yes we do but not till the skin drops off.By Vinz
A husband was stung by
a bee on his penis and it became swollen.His wife prayed, "Oh God may you remove off the pain and leave the size as it is. By Vinz
INTERNET Woman:Difficult to access. SERVER Woman:Always
INTERNET Woman:Difficult to access. SERVER Woman:Always busy when you need her. MULTIMEDIA Woman:She makes horrible things look beautiful. CD-ROM Woman:She is always faster and faster. E-MAIL Woman:Every ten things she says, eight are nonsense. VIRUS Woman:Also known as "WIFE"; when you are not expec By RINKU
Which Type Of Woman Is
Yours? HARD-DISK Woman:She remembers everything, FOREVER. RAM Woman:She forgets about you, the moment you turn her off. WINDOWS Woman:Everyone knows that she can't do a thing right, but no one can live without her. EXCEL Woman:They say she can do a lot of things but you mostly use for your four basic needs. SCREENSAVER Woman:She is good for nothing but at least she is fun!
75yrz old man got married
with a girl of 15 yrz old. At marriage nite they both r crying cuz Girl don't know anything and an old man hav 4gotten evrythng. By Nido
Musharraf said to his mother.Ammi
mari B.V , M.M.A walon sey meli hoi hai!Jab bhe kamray main jata hoon kehti hai wardi utaro. By Khurrum Chattha
A boy and gal of
5th class asked teacher "kya chote bachoon ke bhi bache hoote hain"? teacher nahin kabhi nahin " boy said to girl-dekha aur tu aise hi dar rahi thi". By Sumit
A man to cardiologist, How
dare u tell my wife that she has a cute Vagina, Doctor, stupid, i told her that she has acute Angina.
behind every SUCCESSFUL woman, there
is a SATISFIED man,but behind a SATISFIED woman there is an EXHAUSTED man...
A sardar was running with
his pregnent wife,who was about to deliver, when another sardar asked him, O pernam singh, oye woti nu ais haal vitch le ke kithey puj rya vain, pernam singh replied,assi Pizza hut chaley aan, sunya aa othey free delivery hondi aaa. By asif
Husband to a newly wed
Wife.I could go to the end of the worldfor u,, wife thanks, but promise me u will stay there.By Saba
sardar ji to his friend:
Yar bari ushkil main hoon mairi bivi mujh say aik kiss ka100 RS laiti hay ..... friend: acha, yar to bara lucky hay doosron say to wo 500RS laiti hay.By Haris Zia
Man:what ismillion years to u? God:only
Man:what ismillion years to u? God:only a second. Man:what is billion of Dollar.to u? God:only a Coin. Man:ok give me a Coin. God:wait a second....By Uzzal
Father: Tumhe kaisi biwi chahiye? Son:
Father: Tumhe kaisi biwi chahiye? Son: Mujhe chand jai si biwi chahiye, Jo raat ko aaye aur subha chali jaye!By Uzzal
After a quarrel, a husband
said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." She replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love & didn't notice."By Uzzal
Husband wife ki godh mein
leta hua thaa... Wife: Kaisa lag raha hai ji. Husband: Aise jaise bhagwaan Vishnu Shesh naag ki godh mein lete hon!!By Uzzal
Patient : I always see
spots before my eyes. Doctor : Didn't the new glasses help? Patient : Sure, Now i see the spots much clearer.!!By Uzzal
what's common between the SUN
& WOMEN'S UNDERWEAR? 1) both are hott 2) both look better while going down 3) both disappear by night............
Mother to Teenage Daughter :
"I think its time that we should talk about SEX." Daughter : "Yes Mom, What do You want to know ?".
A woman goes 2 a
dentist 4 tooth extraction doc tells her 2 lie down and gets ready with tools lady lifts her skirt,doc says im not a gynacologist im dentist she says i want to get my hubbys tooth removed
A Train is bout2 crash.
A frantic virgin strips off n says: '' Can anyone make me feel like a woman b4 I die?'' So a man takes off his clothes n say,''Iron these!''
Early to bed and early
to rise makes ur girlfriend go out with other guys.
Husband asks,Do u know the
meaning of WIFE. It means...Without Information Fighting Evrytime! WIFE on hearing this says, it could also mean-With Idiot For Ever.
What do you call a
wife who is sexy, beautiful,intelligent,understanding, caring, never jealous and a great cook? ANSWER : A rumour!
Whats the closest thing to
a womans period? Your salary. It comes once a month, lasts About 3 or 4 days and if it doesnt come,everythings f~cked
My wife ran away with
my best friend. To tell you the truth, I really miss him.