One day Santas Girlfriend asks
him, Darling, om our Engagement will you give me a RING?Santa:Ya sure, Give me ur Telephone No.amit (copyright www.lovelysms.com
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A MAN TO SANTA-UR FRND
IS KISSING UR WIFEIN UR HOME HE RUSHES TO HIS HOMEAND COME WITHIN HALF AN HOUR N SLAPPED TAT MAN N SAID-HE IS NOT MY FRND (copyright www.lovelysms.com) MUSKAN
A MAN TO HIS FRND-MAIN
APNA PURSE GHAR PE BHUL AAYA MUJHE 1000 RS KI ZARURAT HAI BANTA-DOST HI DOST KE KAM ATTA HAI YE LE 10 RS RIKSHA KAR KE PURSE LE AA (copyright www.lovelysms.com) MUSKAN
A Chini was in hspital.
SANTA went to meet him. Chini said "CHING CHONG, MOU.CHU CHA" & died. SANTA went china 2 know thea meaning, that was-KUTTE OXYGN K PIPE SE PAIR Utha. from chetan 9988270747
Titanic doob raha tha. 1 gore
Titanic doob raha tha. 1 gore ne santa se pucha-dharti kitni dur hai. Santa- 2kms. Gore ne samnudr me jump laga k pucha-kis taraf. Santa-NEECHE.........9988270747 chetan
Banta: Marte waqt aadmi ko
kya dena chahiye? Santa: Birla cement. Banta: Kyun? Santa: Kyunki is Cement mein jaan hai dimesh
Santa: What's difference between man
& Superman? Pappu: Man wears underwear under the trouser & superman wears it over the trouser.dimesh
Nurse came out with the
newborn kid, Santa rushed 2 her & after seeing the kid he shouted, PUTTAR hua PUTTAR. She slapped him: Leave my finger, u fool, It's a gal dimesh
Banta ped pe chada to
upar baithey Bandar ne poocha: Upar kyon aaya? Banta: Apple khane. Bandar: Yeh to aam ka ped hai. Banta: Pata hai, Apple saath laya hoon.dimesh
Q: A Man asked Santa,
"Akal badhi ya bhains? " A: Santa bola, "Pehle date of birth to batao."Osman (0301-4876609 / 0345-4566641)
What's Ford? Santa: Gaari. What's Oxford? Santa: So
What's Ford? Santa: Gaari. What's Oxford? Santa: So simple, Bail Gaari.Osman (0301-4876609 / 0345-4566641)
Santa (reading from book of
facts): "Do you know that every time I breathe a man dies?" Banta: "Why don't you use a mouth wash?Osman (0301-4876609 / 0345-4566641)
Santa went out to buy
an Indian flag. The shop owner gave him the flag. Guess what did he ask next... Ismein aur colour dikhayiye.;)Osman (0301-4876609 / 0345-4566641)
Teacher to Santa: is line
ki english banao, usne apna kaam kiya or karta hi gya. Santa: He done his work and done dana dan done dana dan...Indrajeet K
Santa n Banta were watching
a cricket match. When Dhoni hits a boundary. Banta: Kya Goal mara. Santa: Raha Na bewakoof ka bewakoof, Goal is mein nahin cricket mein hota haiAnil
Santa to Jeeto: Kaisi sabzi
banai hai, bilkul Gobar jaisa swad hai. Jeeto, maatha peet te hue: Hey bhagwan! Na jane inhone kya-kya kha ke dekha hua hai.pinki
Banta ek sadhu se bola:
Baba, meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai, koi upay batao. Sadhu: Beta, upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta? Maharoof
Gabbar: Arey o Sambha Sambha: Ji
Gabbar: Arey o Sambha Sambha: Ji Sardar Gabbar: Kitne Admi the re? Sambha: Do Sardar Gabbar: Mujhe ginti nahi aati. Do kitne hotey hain? Sambha: Sardar Do Ek ke baad ata hai. Gabbar: Aur Do ke pehle? Sambha: Do ke pehle Ek aata hai Gabbar: To bich mein kaun aata hai? Sambha: Bich mein koi nahi aata Gabbar: To fir Dono ek saath kyon nahi atey? Sambha: Do Ek ke baad hi aa sakta hai, kyonki Do ek se bada hai. Gabbar: Do ek se bada hai? Kitna bada hai? Sambha Do ek se Ek bada hai? Gabbar: Agar Do ek se ek bada hai to ek ek se kitna bada hai? Sambha: Sardar, Maine tumhara namak khaya hai, mujhe goli mardo par mera dimag to na khao. Osman 0301-4876609
ek bar santa singh pagal
ho jata hai, wo bar-2 kehta rehta hai ke gulel banunga chidi marunga.kuch saal pagal khane rehne ke baad woh theek ho jata hai. doctor uss se poochta hai ke ab kya karoge ? santa: pehle main paise ikathe karke shaadi karunga, phir mere ladka hoga, ek saal baad main uska janamdin manaunga, janamdin par ussey bahut sare gift milenge. gift mein ek nikker bhi hogi, main uss nikker se elastic nikalunga,gulel banaunga aur chidi marunga. singla2
An astronomer was watching
the sky from his telescope Santa Singh was observing him, Suddenly a star falls, seeing that Santa Singh shouted, "Kya nishana lagaya hai!" Mahiwaal
Sardar proposed a Girl...... Girl
said Im 1yr elder to you........... Sardar said Oye No Problem Soniye,Ill marry you NEXT YEAR.azam
Manmohan Singh to Bush -
We are sending Indians to the moon next year. Bush - Wow! How Many? Manmohan Singh - 100 25 - OBC 25 - SC 20 - ST 5 - Handicapped 5 - Sports Persons 5 - Terrorist Affected 5 - Kashmiri Migrants 9 - Politicians and if possible 1 - Astronaut.Mukhoji
sardar1:Tell me a word consist
of 100 letters Banta: P-O-S-T-B-O-X aNanD
American: In our country ,
marriage even takes place with email.Santa: In India, it is only with a female fareen
Banta:how did u got a
new car? Santa:A girl drove me to a beach, took her cloth & and said: take what do u want & i took car banta: good yaar kapde ki karne si. Ankit frm Delhi
There was a short note
written on poster of adult movie. "Under 18 are not allowed." Santa saw this msg, what he did next time he came with 17 people along with him.Ankit frm Delhi
Banta: Name the 3 fastest
means of communication. Santa: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman
Banta: J tu dasde ki
is bag vich ki hai tan sare ande tere, j tu dasde kine ne tan 8 de 8 tere, te j tu dasde ki kidhe ne tan oh murgi v teri. Santa: Koi hint?
Santa suffering from constipation, sitting
on toilet seat: Ooonh, oooonh, oohh.... nee aaja marjaniye main tenu khan ta ni laga.
Santa saw a beautiful gal...
he went and smooched her. Gal - What are you doing? Santa: Law, 4th semester from Punjab University.
Q: How do you recognize
Santa's son, Pappu, in School? A: He is the one who erases the books when the teacher erases the board.
Q: Why Santa is standing
below the Tube light with an open mouth. A: Because Doctor has advised him: 'Aaj Light Khana hai!'
Frog: Tumhare paas dimaag nahin
hai. Santa: Hai. Frog: Nahin hai. Santa: Hai. Frog: Nahin hai & jumps into the well. Santa: Isme suicide karne waali kya baat thi.?
Banta ek sadhu se bola:
Baba, meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai, koi upay batao. Sadhu: Beta, upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta?
Santa Banta zid kar rahe
c monkey dekhan di... so tuhade ghar da address dita hai. Yaar 2-4 tapusian maar ke dikha deo bichare khush ho jaan ge.
Santa went out to buy
an Indian flag. The shop owner gave him the flag. Guess what did he ask next... Ismein aur colour dikhayiye.
Teacher: Pappu, TAMSO MA JYOTIR
GAMYA" shloka ka kya arth hai? Pappu: Tum so jayo maa, mein Jyoti ke pass ja raha hoon.
Jeeto: If I die what'll
you do? Santa: I may also die. Jeeto: Why? Santa: Some time too much of happiness can also kill a man.
Santa (reading from book of
facts): "Do you know that every time I breathe a man dies?" Banta: "Why don't you use a mouth wash?"
Q: Why did Santa take
his pregnant wife Jeeto to Pizza Hut? A: Because they advertised: 'Free Delivery'
Santa walks into a library
& says, "Can I have a burger and coke?" Librarian, "I'm sorry, this is a library." Santa whispers, "Can I have a burger & fries?"
Santa was drawing money from
ATM. Banta, who was just behind him in the line said: I've seen ur password. Its ****. Sant: U r wrong. Its 1394.
Teacher: I want you to
tell me the longest sentence you can think of. Pappu: Life imprisonment!
Santa ke bagiche mein bahut
sare ped - paude thay, Santa naukar ko bola ped-paudon ko pani dal. Naukar: Sahab baarish ho rahi hai. Santa: Abe to Chatri leke dal.
Teacher: What should be in
a book to make it a bestseller? Pappu: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.
An Englishman and Santa inside
the toilet. Englishman: Good evening, how do u do? Santa: Gud evening, we open the zip and do.
Banta asked Santa: Why Manmohan
Singh goes for a walk in evening? Santa: Very simple, because he is PM not AM
Santa dials a number. A
girl receives the call. Santa: Who r u? Girl: Seeta here. Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya
Santa: Sir hun meri salary
wada diyo, mera vyah ho gaye hai. Boss: Factory de bahar hon wale hadseyan layi factory jimmevar nahin hundi
Santa: Yaar mein apni girlfriend
nu gift dena hai, ki devan? Banta: Gold ring de de. Santa: Koi vadi cheez das yaar. Banta: Tan fer MRF da tyre de de.