Sardar proposed a Girl...... Girl
said Im 1yr elder to you........... Sardar said Oye No Problem Soniye,Ill marry you NEXT YEAR.azam
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Manmohan Singh to Bush -
We are sending Indians to the moon next year. Bush - Wow! How Many? Manmohan Singh - 100 25 - OBC 25 - SC 20 - ST 5 - Handicapped 5 - Sports Persons 5 - Terrorist Affected 5 - Kashmiri Migrants 9 - Politicians and if possible 1 - Astronaut.Mukhoji
sardar1:Tell me a word consist
of 100 letters Banta: P-O-S-T-B-O-X aNanD
American: In our country ,
marriage even takes place with email.Santa: In India, it is only with a female fareen
Banta:how did u got a
new car? Santa:A girl drove me to a beach, took her cloth & and said: take what do u want & i took car banta: good yaar kapde ki karne si. Ankit frm Delhi
There was a short note
written on poster of adult movie. "Under 18 are not allowed." Santa saw this msg, what he did next time he came with 17 people along with him.Ankit frm Delhi
Banta: Name the 3 fastest
means of communication. Santa: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman
Banta: J tu dasde ki
is bag vich ki hai tan sare ande tere, j tu dasde kine ne tan 8 de 8 tere, te j tu dasde ki kidhe ne tan oh murgi v teri. Santa: Koi hint?
Santa suffering from constipation, sitting
on toilet seat: Ooonh, oooonh, oohh.... nee aaja marjaniye main tenu khan ta ni laga.
Santa saw a beautiful gal...
he went and smooched her. Gal - What are you doing? Santa: Law, 4th semester from Punjab University.
Q: How do you recognize
Santa's son, Pappu, in School? A: He is the one who erases the books when the teacher erases the board.
Q: Why Santa is standing
below the Tube light with an open mouth. A: Because Doctor has advised him: 'Aaj Light Khana hai!'
Frog: Tumhare paas dimaag nahin
hai. Santa: Hai. Frog: Nahin hai. Santa: Hai. Frog: Nahin hai & jumps into the well. Santa: Isme suicide karne waali kya baat thi.?
Banta ek sadhu se bola:
Baba, meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai, koi upay batao. Sadhu: Beta, upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta?
Santa Banta zid kar rahe
c monkey dekhan di... so tuhade ghar da address dita hai. Yaar 2-4 tapusian maar ke dikha deo bichare khush ho jaan ge.
Santa went out to buy
an Indian flag. The shop owner gave him the flag. Guess what did he ask next... Ismein aur colour dikhayiye.
Teacher: Pappu, TAMSO MA JYOTIR
GAMYA" shloka ka kya arth hai? Pappu: Tum so jayo maa, mein Jyoti ke pass ja raha hoon.
Jeeto: If I die what'll
you do? Santa: I may also die. Jeeto: Why? Santa: Some time too much of happiness can also kill a man.
Santa (reading from book of
facts): "Do you know that every time I breathe a man dies?" Banta: "Why don't you use a mouth wash?"
Q: Why did Santa take
his pregnant wife Jeeto to Pizza Hut? A: Because they advertised: 'Free Delivery'
Santa walks into a library
& says, "Can I have a burger and coke?" Librarian, "I'm sorry, this is a library." Santa whispers, "Can I have a burger & fries?"
Santa was drawing money from
ATM. Banta, who was just behind him in the line said: I've seen ur password. Its ****. Sant: U r wrong. Its 1394.
Teacher: I want you to
tell me the longest sentence you can think of. Pappu: Life imprisonment!
Santa ke bagiche mein bahut
sare ped - paude thay, Santa naukar ko bola ped-paudon ko pani dal. Naukar: Sahab baarish ho rahi hai. Santa: Abe to Chatri leke dal.
Teacher: What should be in
a book to make it a bestseller? Pappu: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.
An Englishman and Santa inside
the toilet. Englishman: Good evening, how do u do? Santa: Gud evening, we open the zip and do.
Banta asked Santa: Why Manmohan
Singh goes for a walk in evening? Santa: Very simple, because he is PM not AM
Santa dials a number. A
girl receives the call. Santa: Who r u? Girl: Seeta here. Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya
Santa: Sir hun meri salary
wada diyo, mera vyah ho gaye hai. Boss: Factory de bahar hon wale hadseyan layi factory jimmevar nahin hundi
Santa: Yaar mein apni girlfriend
nu gift dena hai, ki devan? Banta: Gold ring de de. Santa: Koi vadi cheez das yaar. Banta: Tan fer MRF da tyre de de.
Pappu was writing his father's
name on a 1000 Watt bulb. Santa asked him: What are you doing? Pappu: Aapka naam roshan kar raha hoon.
Santa to Pappu: Where's Sukhna
Lake? Pappu: Pata nahi. Santa: Kabhi ghar se bhi nikla karo. Pappu: Who's Banta? Santa: Pata nai. Pappu: Kabhi ghar me bhi raha karo.
Gurdas Maan: Santa ji, aapke
bhai ki shaadi mein kitne gaane gaane hain, us hisab se rate lagega? Santa: 2-3 gaa kar prg shuru kar dena, baad mein sharabi baraat ne generator ki awaaz par hi naachte rehna hai
Santa sent a SMS to
his pregnant wife. Couple of seconds later he received a report on his phone and he started to dance. The report said: 'Delivered'
Gal to Banta: Kya shaadi
k baad bi tum muje itna pyar karoge? Banta: Kyon nahin? Mein to diwana hoon shadi-shuda aurton ka.
Jeeto: Kal raat tum mujhe
neend mein tumne mujhe gaaliyan di Santa: Tumhari galat fahami hai. Jeeto: Kaisi galatfahami? Santa: Yehi ki mein soya tha.
A man to Santa: Ur
friend is kissing ur wife in ur home. Santa rushes home and came back within half an hour n slapped the man n said: He's not my friend.
SARDAR JI TOOK OUT HIS
WALLET, IN THE BUS, HIS PHOTO FELL OUT OF HIS WALLET, HE GOES 2 A LADY,'MADAM JI SARI UPHAR KAROGE PHOTO LENA HAI, AND ALL THE OTHER MEN IN THE BUS BEATED HIM UP!!!!!!!! By Sonia
Q: A Man asked Santa,
"Akal badhi ya bhains? " A: Santa bola, "Pehle date of birth to batao."
At a football match ground.
Santa: Ye log ball nu foot kyun maar rahe ne? Boy: Goal karan lai. Santa: Paar ball tan pehlan hi gol hai hor kinni gol karangey.
Santa: Im a proud father.
My son is in medical college. Banta: Whats he studying?" Santa: He's not studying, they are studying him!
Jeeto: Why do Farts stink? Santa:
Jeeto: Why do Farts stink? Santa: So that Deaf people can enjoy them too!
Banta: What's the difference between
an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? Santa: The taste.
Banta was driving down the
highway past a sign that said, "Clean Toilets 8 Kms." By the time he drove eight kms he had cleaned 14 toilets.
Santa found answer to the
most difficult question ever- What comes first - the chicken or the egg? O yaar, jiska order pehle doge, vo ayega!
Petrol ke rate badhne par
Santa bola: "Menu koi farak nahin penda. Pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon."
Santa: My dad was an
extremely brave man. He once entered a lion's cage. Banta: He probably got a lot of applause ven he got out. Santa: I didn't say he got out.
Banta: Why is the Police
nicknamed "The heart of the country"? Santa: It beats, beats, beats....
Once Professor Santa asked a
plumber to come to his college. You know why? Because he wanted to check from where the question paper is leaking.